♈ Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19)
Your holiday red flag is that you turn every family game into the Hunger Games and don’t apologize after winning. You get way too competitive at the white elephant exchange and start beef with your aunt over a Stanley cup. Honestly, everyone’s scared but entertained.
♉ Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20)
Your holiday red flag is pretending you’re “not high maintenance” and then being offended when someone buys you anything under $50. You also eat half the charcuterie board before the guests arrive. But at least you look cute doing it.
♊ Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20)
Your holiday red flag is RSVPing “yes” to five parties and fully planning to ghost at least three. You somehow start drama without even being in the room. People genuinely never know which version of you is showing up — festive or feral.
♋ Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22)
Your holiday red flag is crying over every commercial, ornament, and temperature change. You spiral if someone doesn’t react dramatically enough to your homemade cookies. But your emotional support energy does make the season feel cozy… even when you’re melting down.
♌ Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22)
Your holiday red flag is giving main-character energy at everyone else’s holiday parties. You turn the gift exchange into a performance and force people to compliment your wrapping paper. You don’t mean to steal the spotlight — it just naturally leaps into your arms.
♍ Virgo (Aug 23 – Sept 22)
Your holiday red flag is micromanaging Thanksgiving like it’s a corporate merger. You judge every dish, every decoration, and everyone’s “inefficient” wrapping techniques. But somehow, you still fix the entire event and pretend you hated doing it.
♎ Libra (Sept 23 – Oct 22)
Your holiday red flag is saying “I don’t need anything!” and then being disappointed with literally everything you unwrap. You overcommit to plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings… then cancel on all of them to stay home and look hot. It’s charming, in a chaotic way.
♏ Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21)
Your holiday red flag is holding grudges from Christmas 2017 and making everyone feel it. You give incredible gifts but also give off “don’t talk to me unless your energy is pure” vibes. And when you disappear from the family party early? No one questions it.
♐ Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21)
Your holiday red flag is booking a spontaneous trip the week before Christmas and acting shocked when people call you unreliable. You find the family drama entertaining and accidentally add fuel to it. You’re festive, fun, and a menace.
♑ Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19)
Your holiday red flag is treating December like Q4 at work. You judge people for not having budgets, spreadsheets, and timelines. But you also buy the most practical gifts that everyone secretly appreciates — even if you act like you don’t care.
♒ Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18)
Your holiday red flag is bringing the weirdest dish to the potluck and calling it “experimental.” You give gifts that are either incredibly meaningful or completely unhinged with no in-between. You’re festive in a way no one can predict or explain.
♓ Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20)
Your holiday red flag is romanticizing December so intensely that no reality could match the movie in your head. You cry at the party, recover instantly, then cry again at the end of the night. People forgive you because you’re adorable — but also exhausting.